Tidbits and Oneshots
by Nanenna
Summary: A place to put all the oneshots too short to be posted separately.
1. Making Assumptions

Frisk bounced with excitement as they and Toriel led their four new friends into the park near the center of New New Home (the final place Asgore would ever be allowed to name). The scientists trailed aimlessly behind, each eager to take in as much of the surface as they could. Frisk gasped and pointed eagerly at the small crowd already gathered near one of the picnic benches.

"Yes, my child, it seems several of our friends have already arrived."

Toriel's comment grabbed the attention of the scientists, especially of the tall skeleton with large, dark cracks on his skull. "Goodness, it's been so long since I last spoke with his majesty."

"He has given up that title," Toriel replied a little frostily.

"Yes, of course."

Frisk had already run over to give Undyne and Alphys big hugs.

"Well howdy," Asgore greeted cheerfully as the rest of the group approached. "I don't believe we've… wait..." He squinted at the four scientists for a moment before his recognition lit up his face and a large, beaming smile spread across his cheeks. "Dr. Gaster! It's been… goodness I'm not even sure! So good to see you again."

"Hello, your majesty."

"Oh, it's just Asgore now," the burly monster replied jovially as he reached out to shake Gaster's hand.

"Who're they?" Undyne asked as Gaster and Asgore fell into a friendly conversation, mostly Gaster explaining his sudden disappearance from reality and Frisk's heroic rescue.

"The lost royal scientist," Frisk replied with a grin. "And some other scientists, and a kid who somehow got lost in the void. No one could remember them because they were all in the void but I rescued them anyway!"

"Well that's just great, you did real good!" Undyne picked Frisk up for a congratulatory noogie.

"W-w-we should be able to help you all contact your f-families, if you want." Alphys smiled as she approached the other three scientists, who were still taking in everything around them in wonder.

"I can't wait until Sans and Papyrus get here," Frisk said as they bounced in place, "I think Gaster's their dad!"

"Do you really believe that, my child?" Toriel asked skeptically as Undyne looked the skeleton over. "He does not resemble either of them very much..."

"dings?!" Everyone's head turned towards the unexpected shout, only looking up in time to see a mass of faded blue collide with Gaster's side. "are you real? i'm not hallucinating you, right?" Sans's hood, which seemed to have been flipped up by his unusually fast movements, slipped down to show Sans looking rather frantic as he gripped the taller skeleton's clothes.

"Yes Sans, I'm real. You're not hallucinating, I'm so sorr-" Gaster's apology was abruptly cut off as Sans's grip shifted to better pull him down for a passionate kiss, cyan magic sparking between their teeth. Gaster's eyes widened in surprise, then drifted closed as his hands moved to the back of Sans's skull and back, cobalt magic began mixing with the cyan.

"Oh my!" Toriel exclaimed as she covered Frisk's eyes with a great, furry paw.

"I think we should give them a minute before we go say hello to Sans," one of the scientists said indulgently to the others, who all nodded in agreement.

"What the fuuuuuu..." a glare from Toriel was the only warning Undyne needed to change her curse at the last second, "...uuuudge?"

"I do believe," Toriel said while trying to hold back a laugh, "that Dr. Gaster is not Sans's and Papryus's father after all."

* * *

This little tidbit is actually part of a larger story that I'm not sure I'll ever be able to write because it's pretty incomplete. It's like having a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle with only half the pieces, there's half a park bench over here, a tree over there, and that cluster's one of the corners… so here, have the half a park bench.

I'm really enjoying _Entropy_ by talkingsoup over on AO3, specifically the idea that when Gaster was lost and Sans was the only one left with memories of the original timeline that it took a lot of adjusting on Sans's part. So if I ever did write out the rest of this Sans would basically have spent a few years being gaslighted by reality, at least until he found some concrete proof that something had happened.


	2. Baby Cries Like the Baby he Is

"Are you ready to meet your little brother?"

The question seemed silly to Sans, he had been ready ever since he was told he was going to be a big brother. That had been ages ago! And then finally, FINALLY his little brother had been born and he hadn't gotten to meet him yet. Until today.

Sans nodded shyly, suddenly unsure of himself with Daddy standing there holding what appeared to be a bundle of soft colored fabric.

"Alright, sit here and I'll set him in your lap."

Sans did as he was told, carefully climbing up onto the bed and turning around so his socked feet dangled over the edge. Once in position Daddy crouched in front of him and just as carefully laid the little bundle of fabric in Sans's lap, then carefully adjusted his arms.

"His magic is still forming, so his neck is very weak right now. He also just fell asleep, so we need to be very quiet, alright Sans?"

Sans nodded again, he nervously looked down at the tiny little babybones in his arms. Between the blanket he was wrapped up in and the tiny little hat on his head the only thing Sans could see was his face. His tiny, adorable little face. Papyrus sighed and squirmed at being transferred, causing Sans to nearly panic that he might have woken the baby up, but then he settled down. Sans stared down at this tiny little baby bean in wonder. Then he started trembling, tears began to well up in the corners of his eye sockets.

"Sans, what's wrong?"

Sans closed his eyes, his tears now dripping down his face on onto his striped sweater. He sobbed and wailed quietly for a moment, still trembling. "i w-wuv himmmm..." Sans finally sobbed out.

"You… love him?" Daddy asked, clearly trying to hide a smile behind his hands.

"i wuv h-him so m-m-muuuuuuuuch!" Sans sobbed out. Somehow Papyrus miraculously stayed asleep through the whole thing.

Daddy gently pet Sans's head. "And he loves you too, Sans."


	3. Night at the Lecture Hall

The lecture hall echoed with the usual sounds of fabric rustling, papers shuffling, and coughing one would expect to hear as eager listeners settled into seats and prepared to take notes. There were perhaps a few more squeals and coos than was strictly normal, the reason being one of the featured guest speakers. Or rather: his tiny passenger. Sitting on the edge of the first seat behind the lectern was a skeleton, and strapped to his chest was a small, skeletal baby. The baby kept turning their head this way and that, seemingly trying to look at the crowd making all the noise. Their little arms and legs kept kicking, but if they were making any sound it was drowned out by the noise of the crowd.

Eventually one of the university's staff members stepped up to the lectern and the crowd quieted down. Introductions were made, then the skeleton stepped up and had to bring the mic down low enough for him to speak into.

"good evening everyone. my name is sans and i'd like to start this thing by thanking everyone for coming out tonight, let me patella you we're flattered." There was a smattering of soft laughter from the crowd. "and we just found all the medical students, nice to have you here." He held up a small device and clicked a button, the lights dimmed and a screen started lowering. "so as everyone should know the subject of tonight's lecture is applied magical mechanics, i'll be covering the physics side of..."

Sans was interrupted by several loud squeals from the audience, he looked down to find the baby had managed to twist around enough to look at at least a part of the audience. Most of the audience members in the baby's line of vision seemed to be trying to lean further into their view and wave at them.

"ah, right," Sans said with a soft laugh. "the babysitter fell through at the last minute so they had to come with me tonight. if you guys keep it quiet the sound of my voice should have them off to dreamland well before the q and a portion, alright? so as i was saying…" He pushed the device again and the screen lit up with a diagram as he continued his prepared material.

True to his word, the baby quickly grew bored of trying to watch the mostly still audience and leaned their head to his chest to drift off. As Sans talked the hand that wasn't holding the device kept drifting back to the baby, stroking their head or back, petting their little foot, and the like. While it was a little distracting, it wasn't any worse than any other speaker's little ticks.

"… and as you can see right here," Sans turned to look up at the screen behind him and point a laser beam at the section he was speaking of, revealing the second baby strapped to his back.

Pandemonium broke out in the audience. Most of them were squealing, several attendees jumped up in their seats, quite a few couldn't contain themselves and shouted questions. Both babies woke up at the noise and looked out at the audience in confusion. From her seat behind the lectern Alphys, the other guest speaker that night, tried to hide the grin spreading across her face.

Sans looked out at the audience in confusion, then down at the now fussing baby on his front, then over his shoulder at the squirming bundle of bones on his back. "oh uh… surprise. it's twins."


	4. Worlds Collide

Shane hummed to himself as he strode through the woods, he knew of a patch of strawberries in a particularly sunny and shielded section of forest. It was a little early for them to be ripe yet, but he hoped that maybe one or two would be. It would be a wonderful treat for his parents and siblings if they were. The sounds of loud laughter and a few faint, tinny strains of music caught his attention, it sounded like it came from a large pond that was popular with hikers and campers in the warmer seasons. That was odd, it was a bit early for most humans to bother being out here, and the ones that usually did come this far while it was this cold weren't the type to be so loud. Shane hesitated, he could just go warn his family there were some humans running around the forest a bit early this year, or he could go have a look so he'd have a better idea what to warn them of.

Blast his curiosity. Shane sighed with a heave of his furry shoulders before carefully making his way between the trees. He knew a good spot for spying on the picnic area on the pond's shore. He stepped carefully through the undergrowth, his large feet muted by the recent rain still soaked into the ground and, more importantly, any stray twigs. He finally made it to the sheltered spot and peeked through the thick bushes. His eyes widened in shock.

Monsters!

Taking up the small picnic area, only large enough for two picnic tables, a permanent grill, and an open area for tents that was currently taken up by a very large van, were a bunch of monsters the likes of which Shane had never seen before. It was almost surreal, he'd seen so few monsters outside his own family, and most of them were tall and hairy just like them. But these monsters were so different. The only one that even closely resembled his own family was a white furred monster with long, floppy ears, a pronounced snout, and a pair of small horns on her head. Well, he thought they were a she, they were wearing a simple lavender cardigan over a floral sundress.

That was another thing adding to just how surreal this was, all these strange monsters were wearing human clothing. The tall fish-like monster with bright red hair was wearing a tank top and running shorts, the equally tall skeleton next to them was sporting a red, plaid, button up, short sleeve shirt and the skinniest jeans Shane had ever seen, the yellow lizard-like monster was wearing a thick, pink winter coat that hid their clothes and their figure, the monster that looked like they were made of metal was wearing a plaid button up shirt in the most eye searing shade of pink, a scarf artfully draped around their neck, and jeans almost as skinny as the skeleton's, and next to them floated a ghost with a see through top hat on their head. Shane squinted, something out in the pond having caught his attention. It was another monster, he (hopes) thinks. They were floating in an inner tube on the pond, which was madness. The water should still be freezing this time of year. Shane squinted harder, was that a parka? A hoodie?

"SANS! STOP BOONDOGGLING IN THE WATER AND WAKE UP! WE DON'T NEED YOU DROWNING OUT THERE!"

Shane jumped, startled by the skeleton's loud voice.

"Oh let him be," the white furred monster giggled. "He is simply enjoying his newfound freedom, he will come to shore once lunch is ready."

"THEN UNDYNE AND I HAD BEST GET THIS CONFOUNDED BARBEQUE GRILL WORKING."

"I'm not sure it's a barbeque," The fish monster muttered loudly as the skeleton joined them in front of the grill. They argued loudly over it, the skeleton pouring an entire bag of charcoal over it at one point, until the white furred monster wandered over and lit it with a ball of fire she formed between her hands.

That was… that was magic. Okay, so either these are humans in very, very convincing costumes that have somehow re-discovered how to use magic (if the tales that humans used to know magic are to be believed) or these are a bunch of monsters wearing human clothes out having a picnic on a cold, overcast April afternoon when the rains just the night before left the ground muddy. That was so stupid, so incredibly stupid. And he was about to do something equally stupid.

Shane heard the slap of several things hitting the grill while he walked around the dense thicket that hid him from view, some of it sounding strangely slimy? He decided not to worry about that as he stepped out into the clearing the rest of the monsters were gathered in. One of the monsters looked up and noticed him, a green lizard-like monster with blond hair wearing a pink poncho. They smiled at him and raised a hand to wave.

"Oh my god! Hello!"

All the other monsters all turned to look at him, a cacophony of various greetings followed. Shane nervously raised his own hand, "Hi." Most of the other monsters went back to what they were doing before, completely unfazed by his appearance.

"Come and join us, will you not?" the white furred monster said and waved Sane over to her table. "The food may take a little while yet to cook, but you are certainly welcome to chat with us until then. I assure you, the ambassador does not bite." With a smile she gestured down to the child sitting next to her. The child waved cheerfully, cheeks full to near bursting with whatever had left crumbs all over their face.

Shane's eyes grew big and round. "A human!"

That caught everyone's attention again, their conversations abruptly cut off and all eyes turning slowly on him.

"Yeah," the fish monster said slowly, "a human. Frisk, to be specific. You remember Frisk, right?"

The ghost seemed to grow embarrassed, giving out a long, sad, "ooooooooooooooh," as they phased out of sight. The metal monster sighed from their spot next to where the ghost had been, then held a hand up to their face as they began wandering around the clearing. "Blooky! Come back! No one blames you for not getting caught up by the end of the world!"

"Why do you have a human with you?!" Shane asked in a panic. "And for that matter, why are you all wearing human clothes? Are you trying to get caught?!" He couldn't help his distress, everything these monsters were doing went against everything he'd ever been taught. Humans were dangerous! Monsters had to keep hidden from them or be hunted down!

"Caught by what?" the white furred monster asked in a confused, worried tone.

"By humans, of course!"

"hey buddy, don't think i've ever seen you around before."

Shane whipped around. Standing behind him, still dripping with pond water, was a short, round skeleton wearing a blue hoodie over a grungy white shirt, basketball shorts, and as the icing on top: a pair of pink slippers that would probably be fuzzy if they weren't currently soaked through. Slung over one shoulder was the donut patterned inner tube the shorter skeleton had been floating in just moments ago.

"I've never seen them b-before either," the yellow lizard said nervously.

"But there's, like, lots of monsters! No one's met everyone in the Underground," the purple said with a laugh.

"SANS HAS," the taller skeleton said with an eye roll.

"And Alphys has, like, all those cameras everywhere, you know?" the green lizard added.

The white furred monster stood up and strode over to Shane, stopping short when he stepped back nervously. "Do not worry, my child, I mean you no harm. Do you not recognize me?"

Shane shook his head, "I've never met you before. Any of you."

"i'd ask if you'd been living under a rock, but i think that's exactly the problem: you haven't been."

"SANS! NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOUR RIDICULOUS WORD PLAY!" The taller skeleton put on a smile as they turned their attention back to Shane. "YOU DON'T THINK MISS TORIEL LOOKS LIKE A CLONE OF ASGORE THAT SHAVED HIS BEARD?"

"Who's Asgore?" Shane asked in confusion. Was Asgore one of the other monsters here? None of them looked like the white furred monster, so probably not?

The other monsters all looked shocked. "What part of the Underground are you even from?!" the fish monster asked incredulously.

"Underground?" Shane asked, just as confused as the rest. "I mean, my family's got a cave just up the mountain…" He almost motioned towards his home, but stopped short. There was no way he was going to show complete strangers his home, even if they were monsters. Monsters that were apparently utterly insane.

"OMG!" the yellow lizard said in shock, clawed hands coming up to hide their snout. "You weren't trapped behind the barrier after the war!"

"Barrier? I've heard about the war, it's why we hide now, but what barrier? What are you talking about?"

The white furred monster rushed the last few steps to pull Shane into a hug. "We had always worried about the few left behind, those who fled rather then surrender with us. We feared the humans had hunted you all down, so few stumbled through the barrier after it was erected. To learn some monsters were still living up here is both wonderful and heart rending!" She pulled back, holding Shane out at arm's length as she smiled tearfully at him. "Come, sit with us. We have much to share with each other."


End file.
